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Lightening the Load of Spousal Caregiving

Lightening the Load of Spousal Caregiving

For many of the approximately 6 million spousal caregivers in the United States, the elephant is not just in the room, but overtaking the room. On many days, the elephant of illness, disability and aging will not budge for the spouse who steps in as a home caregiver to help maintain the partner’s health.

 

Caregiving for one’s husband or wife is rewarding, yet at times daunting and overwhelming. As care needs increase and the length of illness stretches into months, years or even decades, a caregiver spouse is vulnerable to common stress-related conditions including anxiety, depression, headaches, backaches and sleep deprivation. The unrelenting responsibility fuels fatigue. Resentments also can build against other family members who are not as available to help.

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In a 2010 MetLife “Study of Working Caregivers and Employer Health Care Costs,” 17 percent of female caregivers age 50 and older reported fair or poor health compared with just 9 percent of non-caregivers. To escape and ease the overload, isolation and even anger that can stem from attending to a spouse’s daily personal care, some marital caregivers turn to the abuse of alcohol and drugs. Eventually, care for an ailing loved one can lead to burnout in which the caregiver is depleted physically, mentally and emotionally.

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Over time, adult home care can be too much of a burden for a spouse, yet hesitations can arise over enlisting a professional caregiving service for help. After managing the care for so long, some spouses find it difficult to relinquish their home caregiver duties to someone else. Others struggle with guilt for no longer being able to provide the necessary care. Still others are not convinced anyone else will oversee their spouse’s health as well as they can.

 

Sometimes it’s just not possible for a spouse to continue to ensure the level and diversity of care that the loved one needs. So when is it a good idea for spousal caregivers to seek help via professional at-home care?

 

“We’re in the business of working with people when their aging loved ones might need home care to assist with physical or mental limitations,” said Jay Kenney, Co-Owner of Right at Home North of Boston. “Our thorough care assessment will allow us to determine if home care would be a practical option based on the current needs of your loved one. We’ll never oversell an unnecessary care service, but we’ll offer helpful advice, as we’re experts in home care.  We’re with you and your loved ones every step of the way.”

 

Kenney and other in-home elder care providers note that securing the help of a professional home caregiver is not a sign of weakness or giving up on the ailing family member, nor is asking for at-home care being selfish. Instead, hiring a trained caregiving service is actually showing greater love and concern for the spouse receiving care.

 

Adult home care allows more freedom for the spousal caregiver to maintain his or her own health, a job or regular daily routines. Professional caregiving support also helps the elderly or ill spouse experience greater independence for longer in the convenience and comfort of home.

 

Senior care support services can include help with bathing and dressing, grocery shopping, errand running, meal planning and preparation, transportation to appointments, medication monitoring, light housework, and respite relief. From a few hours a day to overnight or round-the-clock care, home care providers offer compassionate expertise and care tailored to the client’s needs.

 

To encourage elderly wives or husbands to allow professional in-home care support, other family members and friends may consider the following:

·         Ask, “How are you doing?” Many people ask about the welfare of a care recipient, but not about the well-being of a marital caregiver.

·         Reaffirm that it’s okay to recharge. Spousal caregivers need to refresh their own overall health. Respite breaks are excellent for going to the gym, seeing a movie or lingering with a friend over coffee.

·         Help investigate home healthcare options. It’s important to select a reputable, experienced in-home care company. Thorough screening and training of caregivers is vital as well as matching caregivers to the individual needs and preferences of each client.

·         Involve the ailing loved one in care decisions. As much as possible, invite the care recipient to weigh in on professional caregiving choices.

·         Assist with setting limits. Spousal caregivers often find it hard to say “no” and to let go of some home and care duties. It is better for everyone when the caregiving spouse eases up on unrealistic to-do lists.

 

“Home healthcare aides are becoming increasingly vital in our society as more and more seniors choose to age at home,” Kenney added. “Selecting professional home care services does help prevent caregiver burnout and still lets you maintain the control and quality of the care your loved one deserves.”

 

About Right at Home North of Boston

The award winning North of Boston office of Right at Home is family-owned and operated by Jay Kenney and Rosaleen Doherty, CSA of Marblehead.  They have served thousands of local families and seniors since their inception in 2002. Home care services are brought to seniors in all towns and cities North of Boston including the North Shore, Merrimack Valley and the Wakefield/Melrose area. For more information, contact Right at Home North of Boston at www.rightathomemass.net or call at 877-500-CARE (2273) or by email at info@rightathomemass.com.

 

About Right at Home’s National Organization

Founded in 1995, Right at Home offers in-home companionship and personal care and assistance to seniors and disabled adults who want to continue to live independently. Local Right at Home offices are independently owned and operated and directly employ and supervise all caregiving staff, each of whom is thoroughly screened, trained and bonded/insured prior to entering a client’s home. Right at Home’s global office is based in Omaha, Nebraska, with offices located in 44 states nationwide and throughout the world. For more information on Right at Home, visit About Right at Home at http://www.rightathome.net/about-us or read the Right at Home caregiving blog at http://www.rightathome.net/blog. To sign up for Right at Home’s free adult caregiving e-newsletter, Caring Right at Home, visit http://caringnews.com.

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